adventing

i began the season with advent preparation night at a local church with the women in my family.  my mom and i enjoyed wreath-making, while my sisters and nieces created advent calendars and ornaments.  it was a unique and thoughtful ministry, and we all took home an advent booklet to help us continue preparing.

then scott and i ushered in advent with the help of a taize service in early december.  the same chapel where we were married was lit only by candlelight and blanketed in quiet.  it probably took half of the hour long service to quiet me as my mind was rushing this way and that, but the songs which are very short and sung repeatedly finally began to get a hold of me.  the first song was, 

"wait for the Lord, whose day is near.  wait for the Lord: keep watch, take heart.” 

more silence.
someone read luke 1:26-29. 
another song,
“our soul is waiting for God.  our hearts find joy in the Lord”
someone else read verses 30-34 about mary.   

this little bit of luke, highlighted from the rest of the story, made me so aware that the advent and christmas story centers around a pregnancy and a birth.  in april, i had anticipated our own baby’s birth coinciding with advent this december.  and yet in the painful absence of a baby i think the familiar story struck a chord.  the people of God had waited centuries for the Messiah.  so the waiting aspect of advent is something i can understand a bit more this year…especially the first candle of hope.  

  not that this is the first time i've felt that deep sense of longing.  not too many years ago when i lived in japan, i felt poignantly that God had brought me into a long season of waiting.  perhaps we are always waiting for something - for someone to come around, for love, for healing, for God to break through someone’s despair or pain or lostness, for children, for wholeness…

i know that i wouldn’t have chosen the waiting for myself, but i am so grateful for it.  not that waiting is this fun, glorious thing that i would gift to others if i could, but i have seen how God often works deeply through it.  the story of God's people seems to be characterized by waiting.  even the four candles of the advent wreath symbolize the four centuries between malachi (the last prophet in the old testament) and the birth of Christ.  but the people of God did not wait in vain; God kept His promises to them.

 so now the weeks of advent have passed, and i have lit the candle of
hope,
then love,
joy and peace. 

christmas is almost here!
children are anticipating christmas morning with so much hope and expectation.
and i too am waiting for the Lord,
for His answers to my prayers.
for His kingdom to come,
for His will to be done,

for Him to return as He promised.

“wait for the Lord, whose day is near.  wait for the Lord: keep watch, take heart.” 

so i wait and hope to wait like the children are waiting,
eagerly, hopeful, and expecting great things.